We have all been through ups and downs. As we recall our past experiences, we should be able to assess what is ‘familiar ground’.
-With our favorite foods, there is a salivary reflex that comes when we know we are about to consume the tasty treat!
-In relationships, our hearts may begin to beat fast or our palms may begin to sweat…
On the one hand, there are those times we pay pucker our lips as we prepare for a gentle kiss from the one that we love.
On the other hand, there are those times when we disagree and words get crossed.
In either case, if we are wise we can see these places as familiar ground. Small clues can be gathered to indicate that we do not or we do need to move in this direction.
If, when dating, you find that your mate is jealous, envious, controlling, full of strife, has the tendency to backbite or be negative, make hateful comments, sabotage the lives other folks, oppress or otherwise make others feel guilty for this or that, verbally abuse others, or use his mouth as a weapon to hurt people …
Get out!!
It is better to stop while you are ahead. Stop before you like him, and certainly before you love him.
It is also important to stop before you invest a significant amount of your time and energy in the individual or into your relationship. Doing this early on makes life easier. The quicker you get out, get up, and get going, the quicker you will find some one who does not display those character traits.
It’s not a matter of whether or not you think that what it is that they are doing is right or wrong or if those actions are a ‘sin’. If you don’t want to be around those things, you simply do not. And that’s OK.
Scientific research has indicated that humans can only think of one idea at a time. In this vein, every negative thought was traded for a positive thought. Proactively overthrow those types of things – valuable thoughts, time, and energy and trade them for positive thoughts. Think about it, if you had a choice between two thoughts:
a thought that is jealous about another person
OR
a thought about chapter 8 of your new book
which would you choose?
In yesterday’s post, I wrote about purpose. My final remark reflects on my advice about making sure that you know your purpose. When you know your purpose, you attract people who know theirs (and repel those who do not know their own). Individuals who know their purpose will not be caught up in immaturity, jealousy, envy, or strife. We are to be enthralled in our purpose and pleasing our Lord so much so that we do not have time to have any of those traits that I described earlier.
Further, the best relationships are those where both people know their purpose and as individuals, each party is working to accomplish their own goals- when they come together, they compliment, encourage and edify one another and then part ways, super-charged to do their best.
Being around a mate who knows his purpose, believes in and supports yours- that should be your familiar ground.
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